Since this is basically the second half of chapter twenty seven, the goals remain pretty much the same. This is a full on action chapter that entails fighting the vile beasts, but it needs to be a notch up on previous monster battles. Specifically, a MUCH bigger fight, against more powerful creatures, and–this is the most important part–we have to see that the good guys can lose. Let me say that again, can lose. Not that they necessarily do lose, but Ohrder and company have been looking so OP to this point that I really felt the need to show they have some very real limitations too. With all that in mind, let’s go see how we did.
EHLSEWHERE Chapter Twenty Eight
Okay, much better prose than last chapter. Not perfect, but readable, and with a first draft I’ll take that every time. I was especially happy that I got pulled into the narrative; it was fairly easy to imagine what was happening even though there were a number of technical aspects that needed to be explained. I was worried about the little girl monster as I was writing the chapter–since this is supposed to be an all ages story, I thought she might be a little too graphically creepy. So, what do I think after just reading about her? Well, I think I’ll keep her around, but the more I reflect back on the story as a whole, the more I’m leaning toward this is being a “most ages” novel. I’ll be interested in what my “mom” Beta Readers think. If I had to set an age recommendations/ratings right now, I’d have to say PG-14. Over all, this is my kind of chapter, not just action, but tense, important action that moves the plot in a good direction. So, I think it fits into the polish and keep category.
May love, hope and laughter abound in your life,
Mike
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